IUI #2 - 8 dpiui

So have I told you that I'm pregnant? I am so convinced that I am pregnant this cycle, it is almost scary. I dont know why, I just have this calm, confident feeling. I had some cramping in my uterus a few days ago (I know that it was my uterus because of the wonderful cramps I experienced during the IUI). My temp has been consistently high, higher than normal for sure. And the most convincing part, if I got pregnant this cycle I would be due Nov 22. DH, his dad and brother's birthdays are all Nov 23 or 24, mine is Nov 18 and his SIL's is in Nov also. So it would only be fitting to be due in Nov. Also, our last pregnancy would have been due in November. So, all of those things combined are enough evidence for me. I am pregnant. I am still trying to hold out until Saturday to test but I am getting a little more anxious so I might not make it.

So let me tell you about my crazy dream last night. There was some kind of microscope/ultrasound gadget that I was able to look through to see the fertilized egg floating down the fallopian tubes. I saw the sperm penetrate the egg and the fertilization started. I wish I could draw a picture of what it looked like because this is how I imagine it happening. I followed all of the sperm up from my uterus into the tube and then saw that I got to a point and the sperm were swimming the other way so I went back a little bit and I saw the egg right at fertilization. Then I kept going up the tube and saw what looked like a much smaller egg (my 15mm) with less sperm around it but also fertilized. I really wish I had that instrument. I would love to be able to see inside my uterus/tubes to know what is going on in there. Oh well, I am in the 2nd week of the 2ww. Not too much longer to wait.

Last night we went to a comedy show for my cousins school. My uncles son (from a previous marriage, so like my step-cousin - we'll call C) and his wife were there. We had barely said hi, B offered to get me a soda and when he left C asked me flat out if I was pregnant. I said no and didnt really say anything else about it. I assumed it was because I had asked B for a soda instead of a beer. So I was annoyed but just left it alone. Halfway through the night B told me that C and his wife had asked him if I was pregnant. So I guess my response wasnt enough, they were convinced. This really upset me because I went from thinking it was because of the soda and became convinced it was because I am fat. I was almost in tears on the way home (another pregnancy symptom? I dont usually cry, I get angry). I may have been a little more sensitive because 2 nights before this event last year, we had found out we were pregnant for the first time. Anyway, I know I have gained weight but I am working on losing it. I have lost 7lbs by changing my diet. I cant exercise because it just isnt productive due to my IF treatment schedule. A typical cycle is like this... week 1 - depressed from getting AF, eat instead of working out. week 2 - this is the time that I could possibly work out and occasionally do. week 3 & 4 - 2ww, not working out. So how am I supposed to exercise consistently? I am well aware of the weight I have gained, I see it in pictures all the time. I guess it just seems silly to try to lose weight when I am going to be pregnant soon. A year and a half later, that doesnt seem like such a great plan but it is still hard to get motivated. I really hope I am no longer fat and just pregnant soon...